Yet our entire past, which we feel (in many ways correctly) is responsible for how we behave today, is itself just a story we are telling ourselves in the here and now. We join the dots to tell one tale when we consider how, for example, we came to this point in our career, another when we consider how we developed our psychological foibles or strengths. It is hard to think about your past without tidying it up into a kind of story: one in which you are cast as the hero or victim. Invariably we ignore the regular dice-rolls of chance or random luck; successful high-flyers are typically prone to ignoring the interplay of blind fortune when they credit their career trajectories to their canny business sense or brute self-belief.
The power of narratives. We tell the story we want to tell, and we live out these stories everyday. We can’t live without narratives to explains and simplify the vast amount of events we have in our lives. Yet, it is precisely because of this that we sometimes reinforce our own narratives.
A businessman might have succeeded due to his perseverance and hard work ; A politician believes he/she was elected due to charisma and genuine story; An innovator believes she creates amazing things due to her innate creativity. These are stories of how we developed ourselves, and how we tell them. But they usually only reflect a modicum of truth. Too many factors, right from when and where we were born, are out of our control.
Nevertheless, we are what we tell ourselves. When in success, take note of all the other factors that have to fall into place for you to succeed, and learn humility. When you feel like you’re at the bottom, keep in mind about “learned helplessness” and know that you are what your narrative sets you to be. Darren Brown believes that we can learn to control ourselves, make plans without “undue emotion in their outcomes” and live in the present while planning for the future.
